Satisfied
by LawAndBensler
Summary: "She had to mentally remind herself that she wasn't the same person anymore, she wasn't the person that he knew. She was stronger now, more sure of herself and wasn't going to crumble in front of him like he was used to." Post-Manhattan Transfer...Benson runs into an old friend.


This story has been done for months, but I never posted it...came out of the desire to see more of the fallout from Tuckson getting together.  
Set a few weeks after Manhattan Transfer. One shot.  
Disclaimer: Per usual, I don't own anything.

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Saturday never felt so good.

The cold winter had finally given way to spring, the cherry blossoms were in full bloom in Central Park and it was just warm enough that she could pull off a short sleeve white t-shirt.

Spring had always been one of Olivia's favorite seasons. When the snow melted, it felt like everything got a fresh start, a chance to rebuild from new. And in many ways, spring had been her rebirth. It has taken a couple of weeks to get her out of Community Affairs and back to SVU, but they'd done it. Even Tucker had been cleared of the charges. Their relationship was flourishing, he stayed over a few times a week. Noah has taken a liking to him and attempted several times to say "Tuck"…which in the mouth of a toddler always ended up coming out as a curse, divulging both her and Tucker into fits of laughter.

Now she had the Saturday off, Tucker was grabbing lunch from the local deli for a small picnic and everything just seems right. For once.

She spotted him 50 feet down the path. He was jogging directly toward the small playground where she sat on a wooden bench, watching Noah play in the sand.

At first glance she didn't even recognize him. This shoulders had grown considerably and the tattoo gracing his right shoulder was covered in a sheer of sweat. His hair was short, cropped. He looked good. The butterflies started in her stomach out of sheer instinct alone and she dropped her eyes hoping he wouldn't see her.

It has been too late. She could hear the footsteps getting closer until they stopped suddenly behind her. He was facing her back but she refused to turn around to acknowledge him.

"Liv?"

"Hey Bri." She commented into the air in front of her without turning around. She had to mentally remind herself that she wasn't the same person anymore, she wasn't the person that he knew. She was stronger now, more sure of herself and wasn't going to crumble in front of him like he was used to.

She stood and rounded the bench to greet him, a small smile across her lips. Her right hand stuck out to shake his hand at the moment he reached his left hand around to hug her. Before she realized what was happening, her arm was smashed awkwardly between them, landing somewhere along his waistband. He released her immediately.

When he was a safe distance, he waited no time in drinking her in. His eyes roamed down her body, part attraction, and part to see what had changed since he's seen her last.

She didn't let him finish before she interrupted him with a loud cough.

The sly smile of his was back, the one that used to make her heart skip and her stomach tingle, but was now the source of her annoyance. He looked smug and now, she wasn't his to claim.

"How have you been?" She sounded nonchalant, almost bitchy but she hadn't originally intended to be.

"Good. It's been a while."

"That it has." The silence that followed was deafening and a prominent reminder of just how separate their lives were now.

He was the first to break the silence. "It's safe to assume you are still with SVU?" She nodded in response.

Leave it to Brian to not have heard the rampant rumors that snaked through the NYPD after the allegations against Tucker. She wasn't going to attempt to explain _that_ little stint in community affairs.

"I'm a lieutenant now." She let the statement hang in the air, choosing not to ask Brian what he was up to now. She desperately wanted to know, but God forbid she open up a can of worms if he no longer worked for the NYPD.

"Good for you Liv." His smile showed the smallest hint of pride and it reminded her of the look he gave her as she told him about the sergeant's exam. The look where he was happy, proud, but the slightest bit of jealously waned just below the surface.

It suddenly clicked that he can't possibly still be at IAB, he would have first hand knowledge then of the accusations against Tucker. Luckily, he answered the question before she had to ask further.

"I'm working in Brooklyn now." She let out a small sigh through pursed lips as he mumbled "detective." His shoe rubbed an old piece of dried gum on the sidewalk.

She patted his shoulder as a congratulations but quickly withdrew her hand. There was a familiarity there, knowing this was someone she once shared her bed with, her body.

She turned back to sit on the bench, gesturing for Brian to sit next to her.

It was then Noah decided to run over from the playground, a prized rock now in his hand. She instantly scooped him up, propping him in a sitting position on her lap.

"Noah say hi to Brian."

He handed him the rock in response. Brian took it, quickly glanced up at Liv and back down to Noah.

"Is...is he mine?" She burst out laughing. She didn't mean to but the absurdity of the situation was amusing.

"You know I would have told you if he was. Look at him, Bri, the timing doesn't even make sense."

He didn't respond but continued to study Noah, his head slightly cocked like he was trying to see if he could ascertain who the father was.

She put Noah down and pointed to a small sandbox directly next to the bench. He happily plopped down into the sand with a thud.

"Remember baby boy doe?" She gave him a minute to connect the dots.

"The one who's hearing you kept going to?"

She nodded and the involuntary smile started again, the one that lit up her face whenever someone mentioned her son. Her eyes threatened to brim with tears at the thought of all her and Noah had been through to get to this point.

"Wow." He had been watching her, he saw the immediate change in her demeanor when she remembered adopting Noah. With everything he's witnessed with her, he couldn't remember a time she looked so genuinely happy.

"What?"

His voice softened then. "It's just...you got everything you wanted."

Her mind flashed to her morning with Tucker, waking up next to him, coming beneath him. They both helped get Noah ready this morning and it was easy. The family feeling felt right.

So wrapped up on her own fantasy, she almost didn't hear Brian's next words. His hand slid across the top of hers.

"Come to dinner with me."

She withdrew her hand slowly, leaning back away from him.

"What are you doing?" It was asked with genuine questioning, not malicious. Regardless of her current romantic situation, she didn't think he would be interested in taking on her burdens again, and now a child's as well.

"What do you mean? I'm asking you to dinner." His brows furrowed in genuine confusion.

"No. This thing you do. You can't just come into my life just when it's convenient for you. When you decide you have it all figured out." Fuck, that was harsher than she meant and the hurt splayed across his face.

Against her better judgment, she continued. "I'm seeing someone." As soon as she blurted it out, she wanted to cover her mouth.

"Oh." He sounded mildly surprised. Like after him she would have just given up on dating altogether. "Ok then. Do I know him?"

She visibly winced. She was hoping of all the things he asked, it wouldn't be that.

"I'll take that as a yes." She could feel him physically withdrawal as he scooted further down the bench from her.

"I'm happy."

"Clearly."

She felt like she was giving an excuse, trying to lessen the blow before her next words would inevitably destroy him.

"It's Tucker." She turned her head in the opposite direction of him. She knew what was coming next.

The spot on the bench was silent beside her. She could feel the anger rolling off him like waves, snaking up next to her. Despite the heat of the sun, despite the mild sweat of the day, she suddenly felt cold. Her skin prickled as a wave of nausea washed over her. This isn't how she anticipated this conversation. Hell, she never wanted to have this conversation in the first place.

"Are. You. Fucking kidding me." And there was the anger she anticipated. His fist curled in his lap and she stole a glance at his fingernails biting into the skin. "Jesus, Liv, Elliot would have been a better choice than him."

Her head instantly snapped back in his direction. The cold was gone, instantly replaced by white-hot bitter anger. "Don't you fucking dare." She growled back at him. He didn't know if she was angry he called her out on her past feelings for her ex-partner, or that he brought him up at all.

"He set me up to get killed!" He was standing now, directly in front of her and she felt herself slipping back into their old ways once again. The one where he began yelling at her and she curled inward on herself, conceded, doing anything to keep him around.

"He...You don't know him like I do." She felt like she was back in that office with Barba, trying to justify the man she knew versus the man the SVU had known for 14 years.

"Bullshit. I worked with him for 2 years, Liv. He's selfish. Arrogant."

"You have no right. _No_ right. You didn't want this." Her arm gestured toward Noah. "This isn't you, Bri." She blinked to unexpectedly find the sting of tears lining her eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Tell you? I haven't heard from you in years. What did you expect? A phone call? A text? _Hey, I'm seeing your ex-boss?_ Grow up." The final words were practically spat back to him.

He scrubbed a hand over his face and began to turn away, poised to head back toward the running trail. "I'm done." It felt like he was giving her an ultimatum. One last hail mary to get her to decide which life she was willing to chose.

"I'm not running after you Brian."

"I'm not sure I want you to anymore."

" _Always will_ " the words were suddenly screaming in her brain. It was loud, so loud she thought she'd said them out night came rushing back to her suddenly. The way the cold bit through the jacket, Brian's gloved hands covering hers, his lips on her forehead. _Always will._ Her thoughts were rushing through the forefront of her mind now. Whooshing past her, in no logical order, and she couldn't stop them long enough to form a coherent thought. _You told him that. Always. Always. The same thing Ed told you. And David. I'm not going anywhere. You left. He left. Tucker. Tucker. Always…._

"Olivia? Liv?" She blinked rapidly until Tucker came into focus. He placed a hand on her shoulder, only to feel her recoil at the touch. He knew what that meant, upset Olivia liked to be left alone, untouched, to sort her feelings out of her own.

He spun on his heels toward Brian immediately.

"What did you do?" The food he'd returned with landed on the bench with a thud, as he took a step toward the source of her discomfort.

Brian's hands immediately shot into a defensive position. "Look, Captain, I didn't do anything…" Tucker had already turned to ignore him, his attention back on Olivia. "I'm just going to go…" Brian's words trailed off and he slowly backed away from the couple.

"Don't go." Her words were small, but just enough for Brian to hear. He stopped, glancing back toward her.

But it was evident it wasn't Brian she was referring to. Tucker had moved to sit next to her, her head resting along the crook of his shoulder as he stroked her hair. Brian cast his eyes down; aware he was witnessing a private moment that wasn't his to share. He continued his run down the trail, not looking back.

"Don't go." She crossed her arms in front of herself and Tucker could tell she starting to close herself off from him after that encounter. He kissed along her hairline. "I'm not leaving."

"I know. I…" She scooted off his lap slightly to look him in the eyes. "Before, the other day, I said you were just looking out for me."

"I was."

"And then you said _always_." He nodded slowly, unsure of where she was going with this. "What did you mean?"

He smiled slowly at the innocence of her question.

"Always means always."

 _Fin._


End file.
